Duckers


Best Present EVERRRR!!!! <3


Somebody clearly awesomes too much…

messagesfrommatch:

Im a risk taker and a freak. I like to awesome all over the place all the time whenever I want to awesome.

Filed Under: #charliesheentweets

Via Messages From Match

What constitutes as a “Big Deal” and why would you mention the DMV?

messagesfrommatch:

I’m a big deal where I come from and everyone knows it besides the DMV. I’m an aries I like long walks on the beach and candlelight dinners. Boxes of puppies and Jesus.

Filed Under: Also owns many leather-bound books.

Via Messages From Match

You must not get out much then, huh?

messagesfrommatch:

There are two things I love in life: whipped cream vodka and girls that look like you.

Filed Under: Lactose Intolerant

Via Messages From Match
Yaaa.....That PROMISE at the end is REAL reassuring that you're not some creepy freak psycho....

messagesfrommatch:

I’m mostly messaging you because you mentioned you would like to hike Catalina, and I have a proposition for you. I bought this awesome trip off of Groupon for two to Catalina, all expenses paid, and then I broke up with my gf and now I have nobody to go with. :( All my friends have work, and…

Via Messages From Match

How were you raised as a child?!?!

messagesfrommatch:

After reading your bio I think I’m in love. Let’s put it this way; if one day you woke up and your nipples were completely gone like no scars or anything, just flat skin and then once you leave your room you find out your dad died last night (God forbid he does) and then several days later, you…

Via Messages From Match

Yeah, I thought I would never find something that was corny and horny…. but that wasn’t meant to be a challenge

messagesfrommatch:

Press down……down more……ok……more……yes……ahh…….yes……almost there……yeah……oh shit……harder……so good! Yeah, that’s textual intercourse!……..I want you right, right now, why don’t you come on over and let’s do now!

Filed Under: Sexts From Last Night

Via Messages From Match

Sounds like the perfect date???

messagesfrommatch:

Hey, this week I was thinking of robbing a bank, fleeing down to the ocean and faking my own death. Scuba tanks in the trunk. Are you in?

P.S. You probably want to bring some sandwiches or something. No egg salad though, cuz it smells like farts.

Filed Under: 1,000 ways to die

Via Messages From Match

thisisyouralien:

Creeepy Evan



supercute:

I could just eat you up you’re so cute!!


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